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Politicians (n): pay attention
Blagojevich, Burris: What were you thinking? Here is a definition that could be helpful.
By: Vineet Tiruvadi
Issue date: 1/28/09 Section: Opinion
Dear Dictionary,
In light of recent political events, I'd like to bring to attention the incomplete definition of one of your delightful words. "Farce," an already versatile word and a perennial favorite of mine, needs to augment its definition to include the (infuriatingly) hilarious situations of a man kind enough to waive his U.S. Senate seat application fee, Illinios Gov. Rod Blagojevich, and one of the newest senators, Roland Burris.
Maintaining the robustness of the English language will require a few additions to our friend, the farce:
1. Farce (n). Def: 1. Being able to influence a state's representation after being arrested on corruption charges.
After possibly soon-to-be former Illinois governor's arrest Dec. 9, the questions involving President Obama's vacant Illinois Senate seat began to raise heads. Accused of soliciting bribes for a vacant public service seat, Blagojevich's political fate was seemingly at an end. The Illinois House of Representatives, in a ridiculous move, decided not to strip ol' Blago of his Senate appointment powers. Gallantly facing overt hostility from all directions, in addition to specific requests not to fill the seat, he named Burris to Obama's seat.
2. Def: 2. Demonstrating enough of a selfish zeal for political power to become embroiled in an embattled governor's tainted appointment, then getting away with it.
Being nominated by a governor under corruption charges takes cajones. In a deft political move, Burris accepted the offer of Blagojevich, citing the governor's still-legal ability to elevate him to senator. With the departure of Obama, the Senate has no black representation. For various reasons, Burris is confident in his eventual appointment to the seat and proceeds with revolting audacity to challenge Senate leadership, and even public opinion. Despite his contempt for proper Senate decorum and fueled by his ruthless pursuit of the Senate seat, Burris (and, by extension, Blagojevich) won the game of chicken they had been playing with the American political system. Burris would have made a decent senator in his own right, but being a political pawn in Blagojevich's dying moves shows a cunning desperation that, probably means he'll do great in the Senate.
3. Def: 3. Burris listing 'U.S. Senator' on his self-commissioned mausoleum after his ego leaves his body.
Burris has built a grand mausoleum to hold His Highness' corpse upon his death. Already listed under his accomplishments on the granite edifice is the phrase, "Trail Blazer." The modest senator, who often refers to himself in the third person, has even left plenty of space to list his more recent achievements. The alliance between Blagojevich and Burris, under the light of pompousness and ego, makes sense. How these two characters can still influence politics and, more importantly Americans, demonstrates a desperate need for legislative action.
The word has gone through an evolutionary redefinition. Blagojevich and Burris embody the new definition, pushing the envelope of what we allow Washington, D.C., to do. The governor's appointment is completely legal and the law is quite clear in that regard. Apparently, laws can't be created to prevent a corrupt politician from filling public seats with whomever he wishes. We can't even rely on our state representatives to strip corrupt politicians of the power to influence the next two years of Senate legislation.
Moreover, the reasons given for the eventual acceptance of Burris are completely absurd. Racially motivated reasons, in particular, are facetious. Many advocated Burris because the Senate was otherwise visually monotonic (as if a replacement senator chosen by a legitimate body could not have been from the black background). It is nice to see that Burris, with four failed tormenting him, has found his way into high office despite frivolous things like public favor.
Over the course of the January, the newly galvanized Democratic party has put on a great production. The magnitude of the corruption surrounding Obama's senate successor proved to be not only ironic but, you guessed it - a farce.
I hope these new definitions find you well. You might need to spend more of your time improving old words now that President Bush's astute word-smithing is far away from the cameras (and red buttons).
In light of recent political events, I'd like to bring to attention the incomplete definition of one of your delightful words. "Farce," an already versatile word and a perennial favorite of mine, needs to augment its definition to include the (infuriatingly) hilarious situations of a man kind enough to waive his U.S. Senate seat application fee, Illinios Gov. Rod Blagojevich, and one of the newest senators, Roland Burris.
Maintaining the robustness of the English language will require a few additions to our friend, the farce:
1. Farce (n). Def: 1. Being able to influence a state's representation after being arrested on corruption charges.
After possibly soon-to-be former Illinois governor's arrest Dec. 9, the questions involving President Obama's vacant Illinois Senate seat began to raise heads. Accused of soliciting bribes for a vacant public service seat, Blagojevich's political fate was seemingly at an end. The Illinois House of Representatives, in a ridiculous move, decided not to strip ol' Blago of his Senate appointment powers. Gallantly facing overt hostility from all directions, in addition to specific requests not to fill the seat, he named Burris to Obama's seat.
2. Def: 2. Demonstrating enough of a selfish zeal for political power to become embroiled in an embattled governor's tainted appointment, then getting away with it.
Being nominated by a governor under corruption charges takes cajones. In a deft political move, Burris accepted the offer of Blagojevich, citing the governor's still-legal ability to elevate him to senator. With the departure of Obama, the Senate has no black representation. For various reasons, Burris is confident in his eventual appointment to the seat and proceeds with revolting audacity to challenge Senate leadership, and even public opinion. Despite his contempt for proper Senate decorum and fueled by his ruthless pursuit of the Senate seat, Burris (and, by extension, Blagojevich) won the game of chicken they had been playing with the American political system. Burris would have made a decent senator in his own right, but being a political pawn in Blagojevich's dying moves shows a cunning desperation that, probably means he'll do great in the Senate.
3. Def: 3. Burris listing 'U.S. Senator' on his self-commissioned mausoleum after his ego leaves his body.
Burris has built a grand mausoleum to hold His Highness' corpse upon his death. Already listed under his accomplishments on the granite edifice is the phrase, "Trail Blazer." The modest senator, who often refers to himself in the third person, has even left plenty of space to list his more recent achievements. The alliance between Blagojevich and Burris, under the light of pompousness and ego, makes sense. How these two characters can still influence politics and, more importantly Americans, demonstrates a desperate need for legislative action.
The word has gone through an evolutionary redefinition. Blagojevich and Burris embody the new definition, pushing the envelope of what we allow Washington, D.C., to do. The governor's appointment is completely legal and the law is quite clear in that regard. Apparently, laws can't be created to prevent a corrupt politician from filling public seats with whomever he wishes. We can't even rely on our state representatives to strip corrupt politicians of the power to influence the next two years of Senate legislation.
Moreover, the reasons given for the eventual acceptance of Burris are completely absurd. Racially motivated reasons, in particular, are facetious. Many advocated Burris because the Senate was otherwise visually monotonic (as if a replacement senator chosen by a legitimate body could not have been from the black background). It is nice to see that Burris, with four failed tormenting him, has found his way into high office despite frivolous things like public favor.
Over the course of the January, the newly galvanized Democratic party has put on a great production. The magnitude of the corruption surrounding Obama's senate successor proved to be not only ironic but, you guessed it - a farce.
I hope these new definitions find you well. You might need to spend more of your time improving old words now that President Bush's astute word-smithing is far away from the cameras (and red buttons).
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